Not that many of you actually noticed that I’ve been gone for about a month, but it turns out, I’ve been celebrating my wife’s birthday. I used to love a good birthday party – a little bit of cake, some ice cream, maybe a pinata and some carne asada. Damn! Other than the time I had to go to the hospital for stitches because my aunt thought my head was a pinata, birthday parties were awesome growing up.
Everything changes when you’re older … and married.
When you’re married, birthday parties are all about going all out and impressing people. Lounges, clubs, and fancy dinners replace good old cake and ice cream. And you can’t have the same type of celebration two years in a row – no way – so you have to really be good about spreading your ideas out and not using them up all at once.
Still, I have to admit, since I’ve been married, birthday parties really give me an amazing opportunity to score some points with my wife. Under non-birthday situations, she would normally take care of most of the planning, which she doesn’t mind (at least she says she doesn’t, but I know differently). So when my wife’s birthday month comes along – yes, she gets an entire birthday month – it’s actually my chance to show her and her friends what I can do. At the end of the day, it’s a great way to impress her and her friends, and really tick off all the other husbands, fiances, and boyfriends in the crowd.
My wife’s birthday month is something I’ve actually come to enjoy very much, especially since most of the time, life and work really keep me from being able to give her so much attention for such an extended period of time. Admittedly, it was tough at first, mostly because I made things more complicated than they had to be. The truth is that birthday parties for my wife don’t have to be fancy – they can be, but they don’t have to be. In general, I will tell you that it comes down to thought and effort. As long as you include those two ingredients into your birthday planning efforts, you really can’t go wrong.
Depending on when her birthday falls, I generally have anywhere from 3-5 opportunities to celebrate my wife’s birthday. Weekdays are tough, so I’ve taken care to establish that weekends are reserved for me and any plans I may have for her. If her friends want to do something for her, weekdays are wide open. So, how do you plan out a birthday party, especially one that lasts a month long? Even if you aren’t ready to make such a long-term commitment, here’s the formula I’ve used for the past few years. So far, it’s worked like a charm – just remember, you have to vary things every year to keep her on her toes.
For starters, remember to celebrate the day. No matter how big or small the celebration – especially for birthdays during the week after a long day at work, or if she already knows that I’m planning something big for later – I always make it a point to celebrate her birthday. The great part is that because you are planning something bigger for later on in the month, her birthday celebration can be something small and subtle. For me, I always go with 3 things: a small cake, a small but meaningful gift (flowers, a card, or something sweet), and a creative way to tell her what I have planned for the month – this year I went with a hand drawn map of all the places I was taking her to celebrate. Other years, I’ve used letters, movies, even my little niece and nephew to let my wife know what she was getting for her birthday month.
Your plan for this monthly celebration should take into account a few important factors: something for her friends, something for the two of you, something fun and unexpected, and something simple and relaxing. If you follow this formula, everyone gets to celebrate!
One weekend has to be dedicated to celebrating with her friends (and your’s too). This year for her friends weekend, I made reservations at a nice lounge. My wife loves being out with her friends, but hates to have to fight for space at a club, so I made sure to reserve a nice area where she and her friends could sit, talk, and enjoy a good drink without having to deal with a crowd.
For our just the two of us weekend, I took a traditional route and took my wife out to our favorite italian restaurant for dinner followed by a movie. Sounds boring, but since we rarely get out to the movies and dinner, she absolutely loved it. The fact that the movie was Cinderella definitely gave me major brownie points too!
For her fun and unexpected weekend, I planned a trip to a local theme park, but I surprised her by inviting a handful of her friends to meet us for brunch inside the park. Needless to say, the trip to the theme park started off as a disappointment (she was expecting something unexpected), but when she walked in to the park’s food area and saw that her friends were there to spend the day with her, she absolutely lit up.
When her simple and relaxing weekend comes along, it’s a chance for me to relax a bit and not have to worry about having to plan something big or complicated. Usually, by the end of the month, she’s a bit tired of the celebration and we literally end up doing something simple like brunch or drinks at the beach. In the past, I’ve taken her to museums, shopping centers, even a spa. This year, we went for a run early in the morning stopped by a little mom and pop store and bought her a dress, then swung by a local bar for some after-workout drinks.
Talk about a perfect ending to a great birthday month – everyone had a chance to celebrate, and no one had to go to the hospital for stitches.
Leftover Bacon 